Family Worship: Part Two
Introduction
Welcome back. The topic at hand is Family Worship – the regular practice of households worshiping God on a regular basis. In case you missed it, there was a first part to this two-part bit on Family Worship. Part One laid the foundation and impetus for Family Worship, and today’s post will help us flesh out how Family Worship can look practically.
The underlying principle behind my pushing for Family Worship is this: Households that worship create churches that worship.
The underlying principle behind my pushing for Family Worship is this: Households that worship create churches that worship.
Quick Review
You really ought to go back and read the first part, but let me summarize quickly here.
What is a household? Biblically, we saw that a household is defined by the group of people who dwell and exist under the same authority. This is usually, but not always, a traditional family.
Family Worship has a biblical precedent. We observe households in both Testaments giving some level of organized worship to God.
Worshiping Families are essential to the local church. Family Worship is not sufficient for a household. The command to still gather with the saints on the Lord’s Day still stands, regardless of how much organized worship took place at home any given week (Heb. 10:24-25; Eph. 3:10).
Dads/husbands should take the lead. The biblical pattern and express command of God is that the fathers be the leaders in this endeavor (Eph. 6:4).
With those key, foundational points in mind, I want to try and answer some practical questions. Please bear in mind that each family will likely do Family Worship in their own way, perhaps with subtle or major differences, and that is ok. To the best of my knowledge, there is no “Family Worship Task Force” that enforces uniformity from home to home. I would strongly suggest that, however you go about this, you work to incorporate the following elements.
What is a household? Biblically, we saw that a household is defined by the group of people who dwell and exist under the same authority. This is usually, but not always, a traditional family.
Family Worship has a biblical precedent. We observe households in both Testaments giving some level of organized worship to God.
Worshiping Families are essential to the local church. Family Worship is not sufficient for a household. The command to still gather with the saints on the Lord’s Day still stands, regardless of how much organized worship took place at home any given week (Heb. 10:24-25; Eph. 3:10).
Dads/husbands should take the lead. The biblical pattern and express command of God is that the fathers be the leaders in this endeavor (Eph. 6:4).
With those key, foundational points in mind, I want to try and answer some practical questions. Please bear in mind that each family will likely do Family Worship in their own way, perhaps with subtle or major differences, and that is ok. To the best of my knowledge, there is no “Family Worship Task Force” that enforces uniformity from home to home. I would strongly suggest that, however you go about this, you work to incorporate the following elements.
Read the Word Together
If we don’t live according to God’s Word, we don’t stand a chance of having a full understanding of him or of living rightly (Isaiah 8:16-22). Scripture is full of the repeated call to the Scriptures. Just go read Psalm 119 for a reminder!
One way or another, the Bible must have a central role in your times of Family Worship. This means the Bible should be read – out loud – for the benefit of everyone present. Discussion about the text and appropriate application should follow. This can be intimidating, especially to the leader, because he feels a burden to be able to explain the passage. In a great sense, this is true! Family Worship does push us into greater biblical literacy and theological depth. Don’t be daunted! Rather, be excited that God is prompting you into a regular rhythm that will benefit your relationship with him and your role in your household.
One way or another, the Bible must have a central role in your times of Family Worship. This means the Bible should be read – out loud – for the benefit of everyone present. Discussion about the text and appropriate application should follow. This can be intimidating, especially to the leader, because he feels a burden to be able to explain the passage. In a great sense, this is true! Family Worship does push us into greater biblical literacy and theological depth. Don’t be daunted! Rather, be excited that God is prompting you into a regular rhythm that will benefit your relationship with him and your role in your household.
Sing Together
I imagine this is where I might get the most pushback. Singing can feel awkward, especially in small and intimate settings. Being part of a large family makes this easier, but what about the couple in their 70s or 80s? Should they sing, too? Yes, they should!
Remember, unlike the singers in pop culture, when we sing praises to God, we do well to remember that the benefit of singing is not linked to the skill involved. In short, you can sound like a howler monkey and still accomplish the Bible’s plan for you through song! Worshipful singing isn’t meant to showcase our abilities (or lack thereof). The purpose of our singing is explained in Colossians 3.
Colossians 3:16
[16] Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. (ESV)
Singing helps God’s Word to take root in our heart. Singing teaches us amazing truths about our great God. Singing gives us expression of our thankfulness to God for all he’s done for us.
I encourage every household, large or small, to incorporate singing into their regular Family Worship routine. There are abundant resources for help in this area online and in print.
Remember, unlike the singers in pop culture, when we sing praises to God, we do well to remember that the benefit of singing is not linked to the skill involved. In short, you can sound like a howler monkey and still accomplish the Bible’s plan for you through song! Worshipful singing isn’t meant to showcase our abilities (or lack thereof). The purpose of our singing is explained in Colossians 3.
Colossians 3:16
[16] Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. (ESV)
Singing helps God’s Word to take root in our heart. Singing teaches us amazing truths about our great God. Singing gives us expression of our thankfulness to God for all he’s done for us.
I encourage every household, large or small, to incorporate singing into their regular Family Worship routine. There are abundant resources for help in this area online and in print.
Pray Together
The worship of God has always included communing with him by prayer. Do not neglect time before God together as a household. Your prayers need not be eloquent. They need not be scripted. All they must be is sincere. I know not everyone is comfortable praying out loud. Some people have no problem praying spontaneously in the face of a huge gathering. Other people have a hard time saying “grace” at the supper table.
If you are one who is uncomfortable praying, I want to gently urge you to step out in faith and work toward praying out loud. I am especially addressing the heads of households. Your prayer will not only benefit you, but it leads your entire household before the throne of grace. It is a tremendous privilege and responsibility! Again, God is not sitting in heaven with a clipboard, taking notes about how “grand” our prayers are. He simply loves his children to come to him in dependence.
A simple prayer could look something like this:
“God in heaven, thank you for this time of worship today. Thank you for your Word, and specifically for (whichever text you read). Please help us to understand these truths and apply them to our lives. Go with us into the rest of our day and week, we ask, in Jesus’ name. Amen.”
Your simple prayers aren’t useless, nor are they mocked in heaven. The angels don’t pull your prayers out of a filing cabinet and say, “Hey, guys! Check out this guy’s super-lame prayer!” Revelation 5 tells us that our prayers, even the simple ones, are as incense to God in heaven. Think about that!
If you are one who is uncomfortable praying, I want to gently urge you to step out in faith and work toward praying out loud. I am especially addressing the heads of households. Your prayer will not only benefit you, but it leads your entire household before the throne of grace. It is a tremendous privilege and responsibility! Again, God is not sitting in heaven with a clipboard, taking notes about how “grand” our prayers are. He simply loves his children to come to him in dependence.
A simple prayer could look something like this:
“God in heaven, thank you for this time of worship today. Thank you for your Word, and specifically for (whichever text you read). Please help us to understand these truths and apply them to our lives. Go with us into the rest of our day and week, we ask, in Jesus’ name. Amen.”
Your simple prayers aren’t useless, nor are they mocked in heaven. The angels don’t pull your prayers out of a filing cabinet and say, “Hey, guys! Check out this guy’s super-lame prayer!” Revelation 5 tells us that our prayers, even the simple ones, are as incense to God in heaven. Think about that!
Logistics Matter
Like anything, Family Worship takes a little planning and intentionality in order to happen regularly, and I do urge you to make this a daily practice. It is far too easy to neglect things that are good for us. Don’t let worshiping the one, true God be one of them. Here are three practical tips.
Pick a time. Don’t wing it from day to day, assuming that you’ll find time somewhere to get Family Worship done. If that’s your attitude, I assure you that the practice will not take long to die entirely in your home. Pick a time and stick to it. If you choose 7 pm, for example, let the rest of the day flow around Family Worship, and not the other way around. If you have company over, invite them to join you.
Choosing a firm time for Family Worship solidifies the practice as something essential to your household and life rhythms, which is absolutely appropriate!
Be Prepared. We’ll steal the motto from the Boy Scouts for this one, and we’ll pray that the BSA gets some footing in biblical Christianity.
If you are the one leading Family Worship, you ought to be prepared. Remember, your household will only take worship as seriously as you take worship. This need not be anything monumental, but it should be obvious. The text to be studied should be chosen in advance. Any songs to be sung should also be chosen and made available on paper, hymnal, or some other form. If there is a focus for prayer, that should also be determined ahead of time.
Don’t overdo it. You are not going to solve the world’s problems at Family Worship. You are also not going to train your five-year-old all the differences between the communicable and incommunicable attributes of God in a single sitting. Don’t feel the pressure of turning yourself and your household into scholars overnight. That’s not how anything in life works.
Rather, do not despise the day of small beginnings, and be ready to settle in for the long haul. Be excited about small steps forward, tiny lightbulbs that go from off to dull to glowing to shining bright over the course of weeks, months, and years. Do not feel bad if the text raises a question to which no one has the answer in the moment. You are doing the right thing, and the right things usually are the hard things.
Pick a time. Don’t wing it from day to day, assuming that you’ll find time somewhere to get Family Worship done. If that’s your attitude, I assure you that the practice will not take long to die entirely in your home. Pick a time and stick to it. If you choose 7 pm, for example, let the rest of the day flow around Family Worship, and not the other way around. If you have company over, invite them to join you.
Choosing a firm time for Family Worship solidifies the practice as something essential to your household and life rhythms, which is absolutely appropriate!
Be Prepared. We’ll steal the motto from the Boy Scouts for this one, and we’ll pray that the BSA gets some footing in biblical Christianity.
If you are the one leading Family Worship, you ought to be prepared. Remember, your household will only take worship as seriously as you take worship. This need not be anything monumental, but it should be obvious. The text to be studied should be chosen in advance. Any songs to be sung should also be chosen and made available on paper, hymnal, or some other form. If there is a focus for prayer, that should also be determined ahead of time.
Don’t overdo it. You are not going to solve the world’s problems at Family Worship. You are also not going to train your five-year-old all the differences between the communicable and incommunicable attributes of God in a single sitting. Don’t feel the pressure of turning yourself and your household into scholars overnight. That’s not how anything in life works.
Rather, do not despise the day of small beginnings, and be ready to settle in for the long haul. Be excited about small steps forward, tiny lightbulbs that go from off to dull to glowing to shining bright over the course of weeks, months, and years. Do not feel bad if the text raises a question to which no one has the answer in the moment. You are doing the right thing, and the right things usually are the hard things.
An Example
Let me end by giving you a very imperfect example of what Family Worship could look like. I’m going to relay to you how we carry it out in our home. If our example does nothing more than push you forward into the practice done in your own way, then praise God! I don’t assume that our format is infallible, and I’m sure we’ll make some changes to it as life goes as (as we have already done). To whatever end it serves you, I thank God for that.
We meet for Family Worship in my house every day but Sunday, when we focus on the corporate gathering. We wake the children at 7:15 am with the expectation of beginning at 7:30. We’ll find the next chapter we intend to read in our Bibles (everyone has their own copy of the Scriptures). We normally work our way through a book (right now we are in 1 Timothy, for example). Five of us can read, so I’ll look at how many verses the chapter has and divide it be five. As an easy example, if the chapter has 25 verses, we each get five. I’ll read the first five, the person to my right will read the next five, etc.
Once we’re finished reading, I’ll ask the family what they observe and what questions they have. Depending on the passage, there are sometimes more questions/observations, and sometimes less. Any questions that can be answered in the moment, we answer. Anything that needs further study, we’ll leave to be considered later (again, we aren’t overdoing it).
At this point, we consult the Family Worship Bible Guide, a book designed for Family Worship that provides summaries and prompting questions for every chapter in the Bible. It has proven to be a very valuable resource. (As a side note, if you are part of Bayview Bible Church and would like a copy of the Family Worship Bible Guide, come see me.) This is where the majority of our conversation is prompted.
After our time in the Word is finished, we turn to singing. I might select a hymn (in its entirety or select verses) or a psalm set to a well-known tune for this. A great resource for this is the Trinity Psalter and Hymnal. In this hymnal, you’ll find most familiar hymns that we sing at Bayview Bible Church, along with many psalms sung to tunes you will recognize. You can also find songs in other print forms or online. There’s even nothing wrong with pulling up a song on Youtube and singing along.
We end with prayer. Occasionally, I alone will pray on behalf of the family. Normally, though, we each pray. To help us, we created a pattern that follows the days of the week. It’s even alliterated, which helps us. I don’t mind if you laugh or call us corny!
Ministry Monday (praying for Bayview Bible Church and its various ministries and needs among the people).
Town Tuesday (we pray for our place, starting with Bayview and moving out to our county, state, and country).
Waiting Wednesday (praying for specific items/needs for which we are waiting on the Lord).
Thankful Thursday (we give thanks to God for the various provisions he’s given us).
Family Friday (we pray for each other in specific ways).
Sanctification Saturday (we pray for God’s work in us to help us in the battles we face against sin).
We meet for Family Worship in my house every day but Sunday, when we focus on the corporate gathering. We wake the children at 7:15 am with the expectation of beginning at 7:30. We’ll find the next chapter we intend to read in our Bibles (everyone has their own copy of the Scriptures). We normally work our way through a book (right now we are in 1 Timothy, for example). Five of us can read, so I’ll look at how many verses the chapter has and divide it be five. As an easy example, if the chapter has 25 verses, we each get five. I’ll read the first five, the person to my right will read the next five, etc.
Once we’re finished reading, I’ll ask the family what they observe and what questions they have. Depending on the passage, there are sometimes more questions/observations, and sometimes less. Any questions that can be answered in the moment, we answer. Anything that needs further study, we’ll leave to be considered later (again, we aren’t overdoing it).
At this point, we consult the Family Worship Bible Guide, a book designed for Family Worship that provides summaries and prompting questions for every chapter in the Bible. It has proven to be a very valuable resource. (As a side note, if you are part of Bayview Bible Church and would like a copy of the Family Worship Bible Guide, come see me.) This is where the majority of our conversation is prompted.
After our time in the Word is finished, we turn to singing. I might select a hymn (in its entirety or select verses) or a psalm set to a well-known tune for this. A great resource for this is the Trinity Psalter and Hymnal. In this hymnal, you’ll find most familiar hymns that we sing at Bayview Bible Church, along with many psalms sung to tunes you will recognize. You can also find songs in other print forms or online. There’s even nothing wrong with pulling up a song on Youtube and singing along.
We end with prayer. Occasionally, I alone will pray on behalf of the family. Normally, though, we each pray. To help us, we created a pattern that follows the days of the week. It’s even alliterated, which helps us. I don’t mind if you laugh or call us corny!
Ministry Monday (praying for Bayview Bible Church and its various ministries and needs among the people).
Town Tuesday (we pray for our place, starting with Bayview and moving out to our county, state, and country).
Waiting Wednesday (praying for specific items/needs for which we are waiting on the Lord).
Thankful Thursday (we give thanks to God for the various provisions he’s given us).
Family Friday (we pray for each other in specific ways).
Sanctification Saturday (we pray for God’s work in us to help us in the battles we face against sin).
Conclusion
I just devoted a lot of proverbial ink to the issue of Family Worship, and I want to end by circling back to the premise I gave at the start: Households that worship create churches that worship.
Are there difficulties that come with Family Worship? Yes, there are. You will have days when you are tired, or angry, or lazy, and rallying the household to worship together is far from your mind. Please know in advance that God’s grace is sufficient, even when Family Worship doesn’t go as planned or happens in a half-hearted way. He carries us along. So yes, this is sometimes difficult. More importantly, though, it is always worth the effort.
I challenge you, the skeptic, to commit to Family Worship for one month and see if the culture in your home doesn’t begin to change. There is always blessing in obedience, and that blessing is meant to be known from household to household.
John 4:23
[23] But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. (ESV)
***Resources
The Family Worship Bible Guide
by Dr. Joel Beeke
A Theology of the Family
Edited by Scott Brown and Jeff Pollard
Are there difficulties that come with Family Worship? Yes, there are. You will have days when you are tired, or angry, or lazy, and rallying the household to worship together is far from your mind. Please know in advance that God’s grace is sufficient, even when Family Worship doesn’t go as planned or happens in a half-hearted way. He carries us along. So yes, this is sometimes difficult. More importantly, though, it is always worth the effort.
I challenge you, the skeptic, to commit to Family Worship for one month and see if the culture in your home doesn’t begin to change. There is always blessing in obedience, and that blessing is meant to be known from household to household.
John 4:23
[23] But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. (ESV)
***Resources
The Family Worship Bible Guide
by Dr. Joel Beeke
A Theology of the Family
Edited by Scott Brown and Jeff Pollard
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